who the heck knows anything, anyway

Friday, March 4, 2022

march 4

An easy, few-hour plan to distract yourself from greater world events:

1. Spend over an hour on public transportation to get a blood test

2. Stand in line for the lab test for 15 minutes

3. Go outside before you sign in because there's a fire drill (in a hospital building)

4. Get a latte at a nearby coffee shop to get out of the wind while you wait for the fire drill to end

5. Don't drink your latte, because you want to be warm inside and you can't take your mask off

6. Fire drill over, stand in line again

7. Wait

8. Relinquish some body juice

9. Slam latte before it gets cold

10. Take another 1.5 hours of buses back home

11. Get a little grumpy at the amount of pointless construction in your neighborhood

11. Worry about test results

12. Get test results

13. Be thankful that the results look great, because you don't have a dysfunctional organ

14. Feel a wee bit frustrated, though, because you still don't know what your body is doing

15. Eat a bagel

Congratulations! You just completed 3.25 hours of worrying about yourself instead of anything else! Success.